Flying when you’re neurodivergent: you’re not alone, and there are options

I love travelling. I love the possibility of seeing somewhere new and having different experiences. But getting to the airport and onto a plane can be a very different story.

Before I even leave, I can find myself checking again and again that I’ve got everything I need. I check, forget I’ve checked, and check once more. There are so many 'what ifs' to think about. Will I get there on time? Have I forgotten something? What will happen if something changes?

Sometimes the stress builds into a pre-airport meltdown, with tears before the journey has really begun. That doesn’t mean I don’t want to travel. It means that the lead-up can take a lot out of me.

Airports can be busy, noisy places, and it isn’t always easy to find somewhere calm to sit. There can be people everywhere, lots of information to keep track of, and the feeling that you’re expected to know exactly what to do next. For me, the challenge isn’t seeing new places—it’s managing the journey to get there.

I don’t wear a sunflower lanyard; it isn’t something I’d want to wear but you could. But it's worth remembering that a visible lanyard doesn’t tell you everything about a person or what support they might need. People’s needs aren’t always obvious, and that assumptions can miss what would actually help.

A few things that can make the journey easier for me

These aren’t rules, and they won’t suit everyone. They’re options I’ve found useful, you can take what helps and leave the rest.

• Leave some extra time, but not too much. A little breathing room helps me feel less rushed. Too much time to fill can bring its own stress.

• Look for quieter places before you go. Knowing where I might be able to sit away from the busiest areas gives me one less thing to figure out on the day. Or find a gate with no flight planned  

• Bring earphones or earplugs. They can help take the edge off the noise.

• Use a familiar routine. I try to find a drink, find somewhere quiet, and look at the information board. Having a sequence to follow gives me something steady to come back to.

• Consider when to board. Waiting until later to board can help me avoid standing in the queue for as long. It can also mean less time sitting on the plane before departure.

• Think about your seat. An aisle seat can feel less stressful if you might want to get up and stretch your legs. Some airlines will even let you pick in advance for medical reasons without charge.

• Bring a few different things to do. I like having options: a book, a simple craft, something to watch on a tablet, or the in-flight entertainment on a long-haul flight. Having a choice matters—what I feel able to do may change.

None of these ideas makes flying effortless, and what helps one person may not help another. The point is that there are choices. You can try different approaches, adapt them, or decide they’re not for you.

If flying feels hard for you too, you’re not alone. You can love travelling and still find the journey stressful. You don’t have to prove that you’re struggling “enough” to make changes, and you don’t have to travel in the way other people do. There may be small options that make the experience more manageable—and it’s okay to find the ones that work for you.